don't you know by now {you can't turn back}

A sort-of response to "An Issue in Sherlock That Annoys Me and Why", which is an essay about gifted persons and emotion, with specific reference to the eponymous character in the BBC drama "Sherlock".

This is mostly just YES THIS with a large dose of WOW MY CHILDHOOD LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT IT encased in a few giant, run-on paragraphs. 

Also, let me just get modesty and such out of the way: labeling yourself as intelligent is such a Not Done thing (made even worse by societal expectations of women, but that's another rant), and I hate comparing/being compared to other people because I will always zoom in on the way(s) that I fall short, so this entire thing is extremely uncomfortable to write.  But if I keep apologizing every time I refer to the fact that I consider myself part of this group of Super Screwed-Up Super Gifted Super Freaks, it will be even more uncomfortable to read.  So.  Blanket "blah blah, I don't mean that other people are dumb, blah blah my self-worth on good days approaches that of a rock covered in toothpaste blah blah".

( Read more... )

And okay, this has gotten too long and I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore because I'm kind of upset now, but blah.  There it is.  I'm not sure there's any meaning or even relevance in any of this wordvomit, but have some stories about me.

Still sick. Up too late doing absolutely nothing because I've been sleeping a lot because of the sick, but am not tired yet because due to the sleeping late, I didn't wake up until like 9:30 this morning. Therefore, ( quizspam. )

My hands are cold. They get so quite often when I'm up late. No other part of my body, just my hands. Probably because they're away from the rest of the body because they're on the keyboard and such. Interesting. /way too much cough medicine

Joined a Harry Potter femslash Yahoo group/list thing. In Spanish. That's pretty wicked. I'm excited. I hope fics get posted loads. (If only my Spanish teachers knew what I was doing with what they have taught me.)
I'm flipping through the files for saved fics. And then throwing them into Babelfish just so I can scan through quickly and get an idea if I'll like it or not. The one I've got open right now looks really good, even through the botched altavista translation. I'm sort of reluctant to read it because it looks so good and I know that the botched translation that I'll get out of it, though much better than babelfish, won't do it justice. I already know that I'm going to need a dictionary to read it because just looking at the fakeyenglish, I'm seeing words that I know I don't know the Spanish for. Still going to try. I can just see it, though.
Me: "Señor, qué significa la palabra [some slangy type thing invariably connected to lesbian sex]?"
Him: (surprised) "Donde encontraste éste palabra?"
Me: "En una historia."
Him: "Qué tipo de historias lees?"
(Translationish: Sir, what does [some slangy type thing invariably connected to lesbian sex] mean? / Where did you come across this word? / In a story. / What kind of stories do you read?)

I kept putting off reading the Femslash Advent Calendar entries and putting them off and putting them off that I got on the computer tonight and realized that I only had like 2 hours to read as many as I could. So I did so. Which was great. I didn't read all of them before the voting deadline (I stopped 10 minutes before midnight to make sure that the form got sent in on time) and I skipped about 4 that were not in fandoms that I even vaguely knew, but I've since read all but the one that was part one of a bunch (because it wasn't in a primary fandom or a pairing that I ship and I didn't really want to spend a long time reading it) and the ones from fandoms I didn't know. And it turns out that I managed to have read all the best ones (and voted for them) before the voting; I didn't finish reading the rest and go "Oh, man, I wish I had voted for this one" or anything, which was nice. Except I almost did for one. But it was close. So I'm cool.

Found an ER fic that I'm almost positive I remember reading way back when. Not that far way back when, but probably two and a half years or so. Tis good.

Made some icons a few days ago. Because I spent lots of the entire weekend (including when I stayed home sick on Friday) watching my Xena dvds. Man, I love those girls. Haven't decided which icon/s are going to go so I can exercise the new one/s yet. Or, as evident by my repeated use of "/s", how many I'm going to swap out. Edit: Has since swapped. One from "Been There, Done That" for my hughsday/lisasday icon. Yay, Xena.

Noticed an increase in spam lately, so I took my email addy off of my profile page. If you need to know it and don't already, hit me up on here (though it's not hard to figure out).

Speaking of staying home sick on Friday. Somebody kept calling me. Freaked me out. This guy with a really heavy middle eastern (I think Indian, though I'm not as good at pinpointing location by accent in the middle east) accent kept calling on Wednesday and Thursday and though I didn't pick up the phone, my sister says he called again Friday, I assume trying to sell me something. And so I thought it was him calling and hanging up a few seconds after the answering phone picked up, but it was too often to be a telemarketer.
And the one time I picked up, I hear these voices in the background and nothing in the foreground, but I'm like okay, it's probably mum or dad and they put the phone to their chest to yell at their students or something, but then I say hello again and I swear, the guy goes "hello, sexy". So I freaked and hung up the phone. It was after this that he/it/whoever called back at least eight times (I'm assuming it was the same guy, but really no idea) and hung up after the answering machine kicked on.
But imagine it. I'm sick, home alone, pretty tired as I haven't gotten much good sleep at all lately though I'm in bed a lot because it's hard to sleep with a cold, and somebody keeps calling me. I was all like *Checks locks. Grabs katana. Keeps katana by side until others come home.* (Yeah. *has swords.* *is cool like that.* Though technically I suppose the real ones are my dad's. Still.)
I've got no idea who it could be; I don't hang out with the kind of person at school that would do that for a joke. I suppose anybody could have gotten my number from the phonebooks or whatever (though I think we might be unlisted, so that might be out), or possibly got it from a friend of a friend of a friend or something (which, if it were somebody that I knew/vaguely knew/could have known, I think is the most likely explanation), but still, what I keep coming back to as most likely is someone that I don't know at all. And that just . . . *shivers.*
I really wish I had caller id, because I would be all *looks up non-emergency number for the police. calls.* I considered doing it anyway, but without anything concrete or more than just a "hello sexy" and with no phone number or anything, I figured I'd just be wasting their time.

Just remembered that I've got more homework than I thought I had. Shit. I'm going to be up all frakking night. (Edit: Since I wrote this at 2am or so, I have been up all frakking night. Already. And have done nothing of the homework. Nice job. *pats self on back*)