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Got the big bits of my AII project done, finally. LOL, naturally, the morning they're due. There are some questions on the personality survey bits that I left blank, because I was a bit uncomfortable answering them, so I'll have to ask the teacher if I've got to have them all answered or not. I think I've got until the end of the hour to finish it, so if she says yes, I can bs something for that. I would have done it already but I was trying to keep this thing honest, since it's actually supposed to be all introspective and helping me, and the selective honesty I applied to most questions ("What are some reasons that you may not have performed as well as you could have in school" being one of those) wouldn't really cut it. Things like the worst times of my life, etc. And ones that I just couldn't come up with an answer for, like the best times of my life one.

LOL, just looked through the binder and I've actually got a whole bunch of questions on this article (that I thought I finished back in. . . September or so) left to go. Those'll get thrown out sometime quickly tomorrow.

At least the papers are done. I'm a little worried that because I didn't exactly fulfill all the prescribed curricula -- the job shadowing, to be specific, as the contacts there never panned out (though I've found a new lead that I may be able to hook up for next semester; too late for the project, but fine for my personal enrichment/enjoyment), as that's one of the five major parts of the second (the portfolio) half of the project. I've done a lot of medical exploring in hospital settings (the lab with my intellectual!girlcrush Lara last year, the NICU this year) that I could write up as semi-job shadowing, but the documentation form requires the supervisor to sign and describe activities and such, which I obviously never got done.

I'm at that stage where I know I should be tired and I know I need to go to bed (the undoubtedly numerous instances of odd phrasing and--hopefully fixed--typos in aforementioned writings should attest to that), but I'm some two Ritalin (because they weren't the extended release kind, thus one covered this morning and one this evening) and one giant Diet Dr. Pepper (from around 6pm, when I finally got out of the endodontist's) past sleepy. I would be all of that plus one gym trip, but I couldn't find the goshdarned keys with the passes again. IH how they always manage to get lost (though I think this time it was actually my fault, as I had them last when I went on Wednesday). I didn't really have the time to go anyway, as seen by the fact that I'm still technically not done with my AII project, plus there was nothing good on TV, but the fact that I'm lol!stress gaining weight (only a tidge--less than a pound, but it's more the fact that I stopped losing it even though I should be, my suckarse metabolism and all) as we approach the holidays and finals (both major stressors, but the former probably more than the latter, actually) and the restarting of the birth control kicking in does not happy make me.

Even though it's not really possible to do it healthily, I really want to drop 5 pounds or so before Christmas. That playing the viola for mass thing's got me up in front of the entire congregation (plus all the fakey Catholics who need to give my family their seats, LOL), and I've got this sparkly red dress (two of them that are almost exactly the same, though one's long sleeved and one short, actually) that I've worn maybe twice that I'm thinking about wearing because it's an excuse to look pretty, you know? And I want to actually look good in it. Idk if it's anywhere close to fitting, but it's pretty and sparkly and I can wear my holiday fishnets with it and I'm damn sure going to try to fit into it.

Though if it were green, it'd win. Green works so much better with my hair. I really want a nice, dark green sweater, as I have none. The one I've been wearing lately (because it fits really well and was part of that bunch of free clothes I got from the rummage sale they were cleaning out from my volleyball court) is red, and though it looks nice, my hair sort of blends in. Not blends in, but doesn't stand out and look all pretty like it does with a good forest green.

LOL, digression. If my paper on how to become an emergency department physician reads anything like this, I'm in trouble. Back to the paper/portfolio-y thing. I want to take it back this weekend and pretty it up some more, which idk if I can do, as it's technically due today. The teacher said that we could keep it over the weekend in order to prepare our presentations take two (this time to the class--meaning my friend Alyssa, plus probably the kids in there for study hall, meaning a bunch of freshmen and Katie--during the final), but I don't know if prettification is allowed. Prettification, probably, I guess, but fixification, no? I'm going to do it anyway. I had to return some of my book sources (and some I just cited from memory of pertinent memoirs and such I've read over the years, shh), so I've got literally no page numbers in my citations. Normally I'd just make them up, which I might still do, as a lot of it was general information either mentioned a few times or carried in attitude, but I'd like to at least get the chance to try and flip through and find where they referred to what I need.

I can even realize that I'm making no sense.

AHH! Spanish quiz to make up (from Monday, when I did/didn't have the medical terminology final in the morning and missed class) sometime today. Meaning the tail end of my first open hour, as I don't want to stay after and that's the only time I can catch him during the day when neither of us have class. (In fact, I was thinking about driving today so I could leave when I was done with economics and most definitely not stay after, but my temporary parking pass that I got for Monday's field trip to present my then-non-existent AII project to 5th graders ran out, meaning I'd have to park the mile or so down the road and hike in the near-freezing weather. Plus I'm getting towards being out of gasoline and have no cashy money for more. And it's prolly not a good idea to be driving too much in the slippreryish dark in less than 3.5 hours.) Meaning I've got to learn those words between now and said tail end of my open hour before Spanish. Thus cutting down on the time I've got to write answers to questions about the article I thought I finished. *headdesk* The bed is thus not happening ATM.

Date: 2007-12-14 09:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ex-chaosity.livejournal.com
HOW is it that I can know you for this long and still be learning the big stuff? (not that I'm complaining, really, it says a lot about you and keeps things fresh, for lack of a better whatever)
My point being: ADD?

My brother's on the slow-release Ritalin at the moment, but he also has quicker stuff to take when he has large amounts of homework to do. Or maybe he only does that when he's not taking the slow-release... I actually am not sure. I just know he's on it, and has been/is on slow-release for at least most of the time.
I totally have a bunch stuff I want to ask you about being on it, but I won't (which we all know is me attempting to subtley ask you for permission).
Edited Date: 2007-12-14 09:48 am (UTC)

Date: 2007-12-14 10:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] crashcart9.livejournal.com
Yeah, well, poser ADD, to be honest. I've got a theory that it's just--or mostly--the (this sounds snotty and big headed and dumb) massive amount of processing power and speed I've got in my head that gives me some of the symptoms of it. Like, it's not that I can't pay attention, just that by the time most people process something, I'm there and gone and three things past just because I've always been fast. But who really knows what ADD/ADHD are at this point? Well, whatever I've got is mild (not like my brother, who's ADHD and really bad), but the Ritalin helps. To be really really honest, I'd probably never have gotten the diagnosis at all back then if I hadn't wanted it (to be really really really honest, I was self-medicating; partially the eating issues wanting them for diet pills and partially because the anti-depressants I was on weren't cutting it and I needed something to get me out of bed) because I still performed highly enough to fake everybody out. I'm not on the meds at all regularly--I get a script every once in a while if I happen to go to the doctor (last time was at least 6 months ago, I think), and rarely take them except for occasions when I know I'm going to stay up late with a lot of work or have finals or really important tests (though you have to weigh the fact that since I don't take them regularly, sometimes they make me jittery, which is distracting in itself in a "Whoa. I'm jittery. This is interesting" kind of way).

My brother's on slow stuff also, methinks, maybe a slow one in the morning and a faster, supplementary one right when he gets to school so something kicks in for his early classes? Idk how they've got him hooked up now, but instead of one, he's on a couple.

Question away! You know you don't need permission.

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