don't you know by now {you can't turn back}

Yeah, well, poser ADD, to be honest. I've got a theory that it's just--or mostly--the (this sounds snotty and big headed and dumb) massive amount of processing power and speed I've got in my head that gives me some of the symptoms of it. Like, it's not that I can't pay attention, just that by the time most people process something, I'm there and gone and three things past just because I've always been fast. But who really knows what ADD/ADHD are at this point? Well, whatever I've got is mild (not like my brother, who's ADHD and really bad), but the Ritalin helps. To be really really honest, I'd probably never have gotten the diagnosis at all back then if I hadn't wanted it (to be really really really honest, I was self-medicating; partially the eating issues wanting them for diet pills and partially because the anti-depressants I was on weren't cutting it and I needed something to get me out of bed) because I still performed highly enough to fake everybody out. I'm not on the meds at all regularly--I get a script every once in a while if I happen to go to the doctor (last time was at least 6 months ago, I think), and rarely take them except for occasions when I know I'm going to stay up late with a lot of work or have finals or really important tests (though you have to weigh the fact that since I don't take them regularly, sometimes they make me jittery, which is distracting in itself in a "Whoa. I'm jittery. This is interesting" kind of way).

My brother's on slow stuff also, methinks, maybe a slow one in the morning and a faster, supplementary one right when he gets to school so something kicks in for his early classes? Idk how they've got him hooked up now, but instead of one, he's on a couple.

Question away! You know you don't need permission.